$25 for ESCAPE FROM PLANET EARTH? Maybe Worth It

Escape from Planet Earth
Written by Bob Barlen & Cal Brunker
Story by Tony Leech & Cory Edwards
Additional story material from Stephen Fry
Directed by Cal Brunker
Copyright 2013

OK. Let’s put this on the table first: Escape from Planet Earth is not targeted to the parents of the kids. It’s targeted to the kids. Taken on that level, it works. Because it’s a pretty straightforward romp through a lot of tropes that grown-ups will see coming from a mile away, but will still be fresh(-ish) to the younglings.

This past weekend, I went with my 11-year-old to see it — and he’s got his own review coming — and after getting over the sticker shock ($25 for two tickets??!), we went in just as the movie was starting (had to feed the dog and the cat). And it was in 3-D, another disappointment, because 1) I’m not a big fan, and 2) there wasn’t a single shot in the movie worth the effort for 3-D conversion. Not one.

And while it was fun to hear William Shatner ham it up a bit as the villain of the piece, it was also disappointing to see such a huge roster of “name” talent working on a film that, at best, is mediocre. The fact that this film has been in development since 2007 may be a first clue as to how troubled it was from the outset. But with talent like Brendan Fraser, Sarah Jessica Parker, Jessica Alba, Sofia Vergara, George Lopez, Steve Zahn, Jane Lynch and Rob Corddry, you’d expect this to be a rock-em, sock-em roller coaster hit.

Unfortunately, for the adults, the story is a mish-mash of common tropes that have been done to death by now. The whole “Earth is evil” trope with humans being the bad guys has now gone past the point of cliché and is now just tired. The basic gist: hero Scorch (Fraser) is sent in response to a distress call from the “Dark Planet” (yep — us), from which no alien (not us) has ever escaped. His brother, Gary (Corddry) –the older brother who mans mission control — is the “by the book” nerd who gets no respect from anyone. So naturally, when hero brother gets captured and sent to Area 51, the wimp has to man up and prove he’s not a wimp so his son will respect him.

It’s as predictable as the day is long, with the required conspiracy and jailbreak action sequences using CG characters that look a lot like characters cribbed from other movies — Monsters, Inc., Monsters vs. Aliens, and Planet 51 come to mind — with the exception that Alba’s character gets to have a little action sequence of her own instead of just staying at home worrying.

And yet ….

For the kids, it’s going to be a fun ride, because they don’t care about any of that. All they’ll see is Wimp Brother finally screwing up his courage to rescue Hero Brother, saving a bunch of fellow non-humans who are fun to look at and fun to laugh at (slime hug anyone?) from the villain they will enjoy boo-hissing.

And along the way, just maybe they’ll pick up the notion that you don’t have to be the Heroic Figure to stand up for what’s right. Because ultimately, this story is about family and how important those relationships are in the grand scheme of things. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, whether they drive you crazy or not, your family always has that one little piece in your heart that either gives you warm fuzzies, or leave you wondering just where everything went wrong. Escape from Planet Earth gives the main characters a way to recognize that their family is ultimately the one thing worth sacrificing everything, if necessary.

And in this day and age where the traditional family unit seems to be disappearing, that’s not a bad thing at all.