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For Mr. Singleton, VAMPIRELLA #19 Has No Bite

I get the whole Vampire movement right now. I can see where people are fascinated with the dark world of eternal life. What I don’t like are books or a series that stray from the traditional rules: no day walking (unless you’re talking about Blade, who is the only exception to this rule!), Vampires do not “Sparkle”; they charm. And there aren’t any human friends (guardians do not count, everyone knows that a vampire needs a human to watch over them during the day while they rest). These are clear and known rules. If you need to be brought up to speed then watch Lost Boys. It’s all covered in cinematic perfection there.

Now that I have that off my chest, I will get into my review for Vampirella. Take away her youth-like appearance, her lack of clothing and the fact that she has undead powers, Vampirella is just an everyday woman with everyday problems. Only this woman’s problems are a little more than the average soccer mom could handle. Much like Blade (a series that I absolutely love), Vampirella is fighting for the greater good, hunting down evil and helping all of mankind. If you reference my rules above you will note that I only gave a pass to Blade for breaking this rule. That still holds true.

So, Vampirella is doing good with a gang of Christian soldiers, fighting the likes of evil that are surrounding all of humanity around the world. I don’t buy it. I am sorry, but I just don’t see it. Maybe I have been oversold on the “Vampires can do good” movement. I can see a bully in school turning his life around after spending hundreds of hours in counseling trying to find out why no one on God’s green planet likes him. Or someone deciding to get off the couch and see what that bright circle in the sky is outside and walking around to shed a few pounds. The new “Vampires are good” attitude is lost on me. I just don’t buy it.

I am not the only one that isn’t buying it either. Vlad Vampire makes an appearance and he doesn’t have the time of day to hear the nonsense either. But there is a twist to this plot that I wasn’t expecting and I will need to reference Blade again to make a point here. There can be just one Day Walker and Vlad is not it, but yet in this story Vlad can walk around without even a drop of sunscreen to protect his flesh from burning like a campfire in a drought. Are you seeing why I am not buying this story?

I know that I have told you in the past that I love the comics because it allows me to escape from reality for a few moments in my day…but there are alternate-reality rules that have to be followed, obeyed and secure in order for the escape to be a pleasurable one. And this disappointed me when the story reveals this about Vlad. I was stoked, I was thinking that this would be the saving point for the story. Vlad would redeem what little quality the story had and keep my interest.

So now we have a day walking vampire fighting Vampirella.  Okay, not just a day walking vampire, but also an infestation of blood sucking creatures that come along with this new threat. I have seen these creatures before, not in a vampire story either, but in space on an abandoned spaceship that later turn into larger than life aliens that will eventually fight predators here on Earth. Yes folks, you know what you’re going to get. I just cannot find a plausible reason for Vlad to be a Day Walker and that he would also have aliens with him in battle. If you were the oldest living vampire, the strongest and smartest vampire ever to walk the Earth, you would not need aliens to do your bidding and killing for you.

There has to be more to this that I am not seeing. There is a logical explanation to every disappointment that has been thrown before my eyes. Comic Books just don’t suck your will to live? Comic Books are the great escape, they aren’t here to disappoint, they are here to encourage and bring hope for the greater good, to inspire creativity and imagination. In fact, there is a bit more and the fact that I let the cloud of false vampire lore get under my skin made me miss this deeper story.

Vlad may the Vampire of all blood sucking vampires that roam the Earth, but even he has a weakness. So Vlad has made a pact, one so dark that even Spawn would be afraid of this pact. And this is where this series crosses the Vampire lore with Greek mythology. Two paths that should never cross. Could you imagine being at these crossroads? Vlad: “I am not powerful enough, I want more power” The Devil: “I can make that happen, I will give you access to every dark God in time and space!” Vlad: “well, okay where do I sign?!”. It just isn’t doing it for me. And that my fellow fans of all things comic, that is my true frustration with this series. I can’t believe in it, I can’t get lost because there is no substance to get lost in.

Now that you completely understand my utter disappointment for  the story line in this series, lets talk about the artwork.

I can say that the artwork kept me moving, page after page. Not a line wasted, not a detail left untouched. No revisiting of the drawing board for this series. Maybe this should be a show and no tell kind of story. I do appreciate the attention to the details and the characters do come to life, even if they are the undead.

Overall, I have to say that this series is a major disappointment. The story is not believable, the characters are questionable at best and what a shame for the artwork to be wasted such bad story lines and character development. A lot of work needs to be done to convince me of spending my kids’ inheritance on this series.

One thought on “For Mr. Singleton, VAMPIRELLA #19 Has No Bite

  • In Stoker’s Dracula, Dracula walked around during the day; he was just weaker. But all of the rest of your gripes seem legitimate.

    Reply

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