DRACULA — I Don’t Love Lucy

Episode 106 “Of Monsters and Men”

[Photos by David Lukacs/NBC]

Previously on Dracula, Renfield was tortured, Grayson/Dracula danced with Mina at Jonathan and Mina’s engagement party at Jonathan’s request, Lady Jayne realized Grayson could be a vampire, and Lucy became obsessed with Mina.

Now, let’s get to it.

The hour begins with Dracula fantasizing about going out in broad daylight. He grabs some water and throws it on his face. He does the Kanye “Jesus” stance. Then, back to reality. Dracula is shuffling cards in his mansion.

On to Lady Jayne who argues about Grayson with Mr. Browning. “I would have noticed if the man were Nosferatu,” she says in response to Browning’s concerns. Davenport agrees with Browning and Lady Jayne still clings to the hope that Grayson is who he appears to be.

The two meet up for dinner but unfortunately for Lady Jayne, he is off to Jonathan, Mina, and poor third wheel Lucy’s table. A magician shows the aristocrats a card trick and when Mina asks how it was done, Grayson appears and shows them how the magician did it. Then, he goes so far as to apologize for the engagement party and uses the cards he took from the magician to demonstrate to them how messed up their triangle is. Then, he buys them dinner.

In the end, this move only brings Jonathan and Mina closer together. Like really close. Like having-premarital-sex-close. It’s actually pretty hot too. I may be the only the one who sees it but there is some real chemistry between Jonathan and Mina. Which is more than I can say for Grayson/Dracula and Mina. Still, while I am glad they moved the Jonathan/Mina story along, I feel very cheated not having any hot Grayson/Dracula and Lady Jayne scenes two weeks in a row. That’s just too long.

Just saying.

Anyway, the two lovebirds make love and Jonathan says they should elope but Mina is not ashamed of their act and wishes to have a nice church wedding.

Back at dinner, Lucy goes over to Lady Jayne’s table at the dinner and Lady Jayne tells her how she empathizes with her longing for Mina. Lucy is happy to finally have an ally who understands her. But we know better. Lady Jayne is just using her to drive a wedge between Jonathan and Mina so that she can have Grayson all to herself.

When we come back to Dracula, he hands a block of “nickel-steel alloy” to Jonathan. And they make Empire and Colonial Metallurgy their next target. Namely the owner, Ewan Telford III. We learn he is Bostonian, loves the Wild Wild West, and has a poker game tonight. That’s when Renfield pops in to deliver a note to Grayson/Dracula and Jonathan is quickly dismissed.

Now, we get to learn about the cryptic Dresden triptych. In case we didn’t hear it the first time, we hear Davenport say it again as we join him and his men Cameron and Hackett. The triptych is in an auction, according to Cameron, and Davenport tells Hackett to get it since he must have whatever Grayson wants.

At the poker game with Telford, Grayson/Dracula pulls a hustle and winds up winning Telford’s business. He tells Renfield, who informs him that the Annual Stockholders Meeting for British Imperial Coolant has been moved to noon on Friday and he has to come to a meeting or risk losing the company. Dracula isn’t happy about it, but when is he ever?

Looks like Mina is still snooping in Van Helsing’s affairs, which is pretty stupid of her. She fiddles around with the weird substance that she found a couple of episodes back.  She pulls out a dead mouse and injects the substance into it. Then, she wraps up the mouse and hides it. And it moves!

Back to Lady Jayne, who meets Lucy and practically seduces her into going after Mina, explaining that Mina probably feels the same way. She even feels her up a little when talking to her. It’s all a ruse to keep Mina from Grayson/Dracula. Kind of like something he would do which is why they are so perfect together.

Back to Harker, who did something wrong again. He meets up with Grayson/Dracula at his home. Grayson/Dracula shows him the article Jonathan wrote about General Shaw and Dracula is upset. Or so it seems. Dracula smiles as he leaves the room. Everything is going according to plan. (I’d really like to know what that plan is, by the way.)

When Mina confronts Van Helsing on the substance she found and it’s reanimating properties, he tells her it’s just parasites. And when he is this close to killing her, she tells him her mother died of cancer and that she wants to “cure death”. She apologizes for the outburst and leaves him to think about his own family, which seems to be all he does lately.

Lady Jayne meets Mr. Browning at his carriage and shows him the paper. She gloats that Grayson will be at the meeting and he warns her that if she’s wrong about Grayson, she’ll have to deal with him in addition to the Brotherhood.

Meanwhile, Jonathan and Mina are having a gay old time at a carousel until Davenport shows up to put a damper on the party. He tells Jonathan that he knows Grayson was behind the article on Shaw and invites him to see A Doll’s House. Turns out Vera Markham is in the play. Jonathan leaves before the end of the first act. Bad theatre etiquette.

Then we get to the crux of the episode. Lucy kisses Mina and it is…awkward. Mina is not interested. She’s also pretty upset. I really do feel for Lucy, but she is too weak for her own good. She mistakenly tells Mina she loves her as more than a sister and expects Mina to return her feelings. But Mina wants nothing to do with her now.

In the next scene, we get to see Dracula in the electrical room, strapped in and wearing almost nothing. Thank you, NBC.

Anyway, he undergoes the serum experiment to ready himself for the meeting with the stockholders. That meeting goes pretty well. Grayson sits down and makes a good case for the profits that will be coming in soon, while also restating his faith in the company, eliciting a round of applause from the men. Then, he’s interrupted by a worried Renfield, who leads him out. The only bad thing that happens is that his face is burned. Other than that, its a success.

Back to Van Helsing who is looking at a picture of his target, Mr. Browning. He remembers having his son ripped away and seeing Mr. Browning’s horrible face. It’s pretty much the same flashback as last time. I would love to see a new flashback of Van Helsing in happier times before all this happened. Maybe it would make me care more. Just saying.

We end the episode on Dracula, who tracks down Vera at the theatre and regains his strength by draining her. And HE’S BACK! No more burns. He walks out of the theatre feeling great.

And that’s it. That’s all we get until Jan. 3rd when Dracula returns with “Servant to Two Masters.” It appears he might bite Mina and he’s well on his way to being almost human. Do join me for the next recap, will you?

Until then…BITE ME!

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