Review: THE BONE YARD is a Ghoulishly Good Time

The Boneyard (1991)
Written and Directed by James Cummins
Produced by Richard F. Brophy
Rated R, 98 minutes

1991’s The Boneyard is a creepy bit of silliness whose creativity and heart outweighs it’s shortcomings.

The film centers around a worn down psychic named Allie (Deborah Rose), who’s haunted by the murdered children that she assisted the police in locating.
She’s pulled out of retirement by senior homicide detective Jersey (Ed Nelson) to help identify the bodies of three partially mummified children found in the basement of a local mortician’s funeral home.

The mortician claims that the corpses are not children at all, but rather Kyoshi — “the empty ones” — demonic ghouls who feed off human flesh. So, what does local law enforcement do when presented with this info? Why, they transfer the “corpses” to the county morgue, of course! Sure enough, the ghouls awaken and commence to feasting on anyone they can get their claws on. This includes the night receptionist, who has the greatest character name in the history of film: Ms. Poopinplatz (Phyllis Diller).

The only drawback to the film is its inability to commit to either a serious tone of the fiendish Kyoshi or revel in the lunacy of the last 20 minutes when Poopinplatz mutates into a 7 foot tall bug eyed giant along with her poodle Floofsoms, who now walks upright complete with a oversized pink hairbow (as shown on the poster).

The acting is pretty solid throughout the movie, considering the cast is a mixture of semi pros and seasoned television actors, including Nelson and Norman Fell. Legendary comedienne Diller, minus her trademark wigs, chews the scenery with snarky abandon as Poopinplatz.

In a deranged bit of last minute casting Fell, television’s favorite grumpy landlord Mr. Roper, was chosen to replace Rock and Roll Hall of Famer Alice Cooper as the aging hippie coroner Shepard a week before principal photography was to begin. Fell’s by the numbers performance is fine, though it does leave one to imagine what sort of eccentric performance Cooper would have brought to the film portraying the summer of love reject.

 

Filmed over the span of five weeks in Statesville, North Carolina with a budget of $950,000, The Boneyard marked the debut of writer director James Cummins.

Cummins was no stranger to the wild world of horror, having previously worked on John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) in the make-up department and having designed both the iconic Vietnam era zombie “Big Ben” for the horror comedy House (1985) and the infamous electric drill guitar for Slumber Party Massacre 2 (1987). His behind the scenes experience served him well creating a unique spin on the single location Zombie-fest by making his monsters fictionalized Chinese ghouls instead of the traditional brain eaters. Following The Boneyard, he directed Dark:30 and Harbinger, then became a self-published author following open heart surgery.

Although the tone of The Boneyard is inconsistent, it’s the combination of truly terrifying and utterly ridiculous monsters that steals the show. These gruesome effects come courtesy of make-up and effects wizard Bill Corso. His budding talent is on full display throughout the film, but are truly showcased by the full body prosthetics created for the fiendish Kyoshi, completely transforming the trio into genuine nightmare fuel.

 

 

Corso’s creativity would not go unnoticed winning 2005’s Oscar for Best Achievement in Make Up for the dark children’s fantasy Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events.

If you’re in the mood for a hidden gem perfect for a late night caffeine or, adult beverage fueled marathon add The Boneyard to your watchlist. Just watch out for the demonic poodle! The Boneyard is currently available for streaming on Tubi and YouTube as well as a special edition DVD and Blu-ray from Code Red through Amazon.

One from the Vaults is the first in a series of retro reviews celebrating the most outlandish, outrageous and over-the top films ever created.