Mr. Smith: "Game of Thrones" Causes Squee

I can’t stop squealing. Oh the joy I feel with every episode.

Here is your episode recap via HBO’s website.

We met Hodor this week. Hodor hodor, hodor hodor hodor. Hodor. No really. Hodor.

Ned had a lovely time doing some investigating. For some reason, in the book, as I was reading about him running around and finding out stuff about Jon Arron’s Death, I didn’t really put it together that he was totally Columbo-ing the hell out of “The Case of the Strong Seed.” Turns out maybe Jon Arron found out too much about King Robert’s bastard son. I don’t think the Lannisters want that coming out, do you? The scene where it all falls into place is great. Nothing has to be said, we just….know. This kid is special.

I’m starting to notice a pattern. In the books, there are certain things that are described, like the helmet King Robert’s son made, that we want very badly to see. Do we see it? No. Not yet anyway. We haven’t gotten a good look at The Mountain yet either. George, you are such a tease.

We also meet Sam, and we’re gonna love Sam so much. He’s Craven, I know, but come on. He’s ADORABLE. He and John are developing their relationship, and it’s pretty compelling. There’s a wonderful scene where they are chatting about lost opportunities for love, well, not love exactly, sex really, but we see John’s shame of being a bastard, which runs pretty deep it would seem. Then old grumpy pants (don’t remember his name, thus grumpy pants) comes in and starts barking out stories about cannibalism. I guess it gets cold north of the wall when winter comes.

I’m dying to know what planet they are on, where winter can last ten years, but they still call North, “North.”

Aria’s training, Sansa is super pissed at her dad for setting her up with such a simpering jerk, and Bran’s getting a saddle made. Thanks Tyrion!!

Ooooh Tyrion. He’s in trouble. What makes this show SO GOOD are scenes like the one in a tavern on the King’s road, where Tyrion stumbles in and gets COMPLETELY BLINDSIDED by the news that he’s wanted by Lady Stark for the failed murder attempt on her son. It was the classic shakedown scene of all time. It gave me goosebumps on my goosebumps on my Hodor. Just a brilliant, brilliant scene.

Two more things I want to mention. First, Viserys better get a lid on that dragon he thinks he has inside him, or another girl might beat his face in with gaudy jewelry. Daenarys is a total warrior queen now -er- Calisi. Sorry. How cool is that? I’ll tell you. VERY cool.

Second, the greatest thing I’ve ever seen, EVER. The slow and agonizing death of Jon Arron’s recently knighted former squire at the end of The Mountain That Rides’ lance during the jousting competition to celebrate the appointment of the new hand. Right in front of Sansa. It seems that at every turn Sansa is realizing that fairy tale princesses don’t have lives like fairy tale princesses. Nothing would indicate that tidbit better to me than seeing a man spew blood from his neck and mouth while he slowly, and I mean slowly, dies with a lance tip jutting out of him. Then some squires come and unceremoniously drag him away. Not ’till after he’s dead though. Any sooner would be…too soon. That’s they way I imagine jousting. Just a bloody ol’ business.

That got me thinking. Why did people stop jousting? I asked my friend who is studying for her doctorate in Medieval studies, and she was able to tell me that it was not the implementation of gunpowder as a propellant of projectiles for the armies of Europe. Which was my theory. Which was wrong. So the world may never know. Maybe you have a theory. Bet it’s wrong though.

See ya.

Preview of Episode 5:

[youtube=http://youtu.be/qKxOe8sspKM]